My Grandpa!

We all know someone in our lives that is virtuous. My person happened to be my grandpa. It’s been two years since my grandfather passed away from cancer, and it was the hardest time that I have ever experienced in my life. His name was Virendra Kumar Sinha. He came to live with us five years back when his beloved, my granny, died of heart attack. He was completely lost, unable to express what had just happened to him, and refused to allow the process of healing by closing himself off from everyone around him. That was when my mom took a decision to bring him to our place because he was her only family left now. Life had been very cruel to my grandpa. He lost his young son who was the Captain in the Indian Army. My mother and my granny were the only reason for his existence but granny was also gone soon.

He was seventy one years of age when he came to stay with us. He was very handsome, tall and fit as a fiddle. He used to help everyone as much as he could and was really active. He was a man of wisdom, faith, compassion, and generosity. He was the one person I looked up to other than my parents. He showed me and my family that you are never too old to achieve your dreams and goals. All in his life has just started to take the right track, when he was diagnosed with cancer. As both my parents were doctors we consulted the best doctors but the only solution to this problem was an operation. After a lot of consolation, he finally agreed to get operated. After the operation, he came back from the hospital and looked thin, frail, feeble, weak and highly depressed. The fact that now he had to depend on someone for taking care of him broke him emotionally. As days passed we could see that he was giving up on life. It was very heartbreaking to see such a fit person bed ridden. Soon after one year of his struggle with life, his soul finally found peace. His death had a huge impact on my mother as she had lost everyone in her family. It impacted me as well but that could not be compared to my mother’s grief.

Dealing with the death of a loved one was difficult but I never knew it was this difficult. Till day my heart sinks when I remember him. The bond we shared was magical. He was the one person who stood through the thick and thin times of my life and understood me completely. Sometimes I feel that I did not give him much time and attention when he needed it the most. This thought fills me with great remorse. I think I was too busy with my school, exams and tuitions. I think he would have felt better if I was always there with him or gave him most of my time. I know the regret I have does not have a good reason behind because I could just not do away with my school or tuitions. It is only the fact of losing him which makes me think that way. I did not want him to leave me so soon. Also, at the same time I know that he did not succumb to the fatal disease he suffered from; but from the depression of seeing himself in that condition. He could just not accept that way of living.

All I want to say to him now is that I Love You Grandpa and I Miss You a lot. I hope you are seeing me from somewhere in the heaven and being proud of me.

P.S: The memory which I have penned down is related to my grandpa, how his death has affected me, how much I love him and how bad I miss him. This can somewhere be related to the themes love, death, memories and grandparents. The chapter, “The Photograph” by Ruskin Bond also speaks about a child and his love and bond with his grandmother. It explains how grandparents make the world a little softer, a little kinder and a little warmer.